Monday, March 31, 2008

Where Has All My Creativity Gone?

I'm not sure if it's the change in weather that I was so looking forward to, or work getting on top of me like it often does, or some of my other previously identified demons. Whatever it is it seems like my creativity, my energy and my zest for life have left the building. I have no desire to paint, collage, sew, blog or anything else remotely creative. When I do try to do these things telling myself that it will make me feel better it feels forced and chore-like and makes me feel even worse.

It's a horrible feeling when I don't feel creative. I always think that it's never going to come back. It always does, and on some level I know it will, but at the time there is always this sense of fear. Perhaps it is the not knowing when that is so hard to deal with. I have never been all that good at giving in and going with the flow - in other words just trusting.

In the absence of creativity, work is even more of a drag than usual. When I am energised by art, craft and blogging work becomes insignificant and I am excited by the possibility of a future and a vision of me as an artist or crafts woman. When the creativity goes I become terrified that I will never get to do work that nurtures my soul and makes me happy. Instead I envisage that I will have to keep doing what I have been doing for so long.

Woe is me today!

Part of my fear is about all the things that I have started working on or ideas that I may never get finished or even started.
So I'm going to write down my crafty intentions so they can't get lost. Here goes in no particular order:
  • Finish artworks for my 1st market stall
  • Make a plastic shopping bag and coin purse - inspiration from here
  • Make envelopes using vintage cookbooks just like these
  • Make a travel wallet like the one I found here and here
  • Finish my art swap piece for this lovely woman
  • Finish the entry that I have been working on for the Cancer Council Arts Awards
  • Finish the clutch purse I am making for my partner's neice
  • Finish putting together the top of my first patchwork quilt
There we have it. Recorded in history never to be lost of forgotten. Perhaps now I can go and take a long, hot bath and be kind to myself.


CurlyPops said...

I'm sure you'll get your mojo back soon. Hang in there.

Tessa said...

I have found that after a leave of absence once your creative juices do start flowing again they flow at a more rapid and vivacious pace. I am sure that you will recieve the inspiration soon and with vigor. :)